HAHAS. i love the company of my girlfrens. =)) lalas. i duno. mayb im into gurls. =x hu noes.. lols. lets see. hahahas. the horoscope readin was rite. =)

stupid chem practical dirtied my shirt. lucky chicky lent me his shirt. if not i'll be goin home lookin dirty and disgustin.. thnks boy. =)) lols. he's so nice larr. he went to buy another PE shirt.. x) i feel bah. but its okie! he's rich. =x but its weird dat he's so nice to me.. hahas. mayb he got some ulterior motive. you'll nvr noe wat dis stupid boy has in his chicken brain. x))

it feel so dumb to tink dat i stil haven got over completely. i still dun dare to look at you when you are wif her. i know im dumb. i noe i sound dumb too.. but, im tryin alrite.. im tryin hard, juz to treat you like a normal fren.. all i need is time..

im still so into you! x)


you make me go crazy.

ah ah ah~ i wan my WONDERBOY!!!!

WEEEEEE~ xDD im super high. lalas.

i practically went crazy after recess today. my face turned soooo red larr. x)) shalalas. =)) hahas. im crazy. juz ignore me, like wat bestie does. =x

stupid huat. make me EXERCISE alot today. lols. and cause of dat, she owe me an ice cream. lols. but i still tink its unfair. her 'package' includes SOO many things lar. HUAT IS A BIG BULLY.X(

ytd nite was a disaster. dun wanna mention it again. but thnks to difficult guy, he filled my nite wif laughter. i like dis small lil part::
ME:: funny chap =) lols
DG:: i charging u de lehz.. u tink free one mehz..
DG:: entertaining u need mi to tink hard
ME:: hahas. how you charge?
DG:: errrrm ......errrrm
DG:: u offer de price u willing to giv mi lorx
ME:: hahs. you sound like....... err. lols xDDD
DG:: sound like wat???
ME:: lols. nth. hahas.
DG:: oic i noe liao
ME:: hahas.xD
DG:: TTS IT.
ME:: x((
its okie if you dun understand. x))

i swear i'll skin you alive one day. BASTARD. =x


i waited and waited, but you nvr came..

SCHOOL'S BORING. x((

lalas. practically did nth in school today except for readin storybook. had breakfast at BK today mornin. *yums. it has been a long time since i last eaten BK breakfast..

eww, LAME SHIT.! damn damn.

i wanna be who i am.

oh ya, hahas, bestie is a LOSER! x))) lalalas. he's so fun to play wif.. hahas. how i wish i can REAR him. HAHAS.


you left me this roses.. and you just left...

are those tears going to flow again..?
is the heart going to ache again..?
my heart is thumpin fast.
it seems like im gonna fall again.
real hard. i hate the feelin..
but im used to der pain.. somehow..

LOSER.LOSER.LOSER.LOSER.LOSER.

argh. i have no idea wat im doing oso. pardon me.

GOOD MORNING! =)) im in high spirits today. (am i? =x im not sure..)

THURS::
school celebrated Racial Harmony Day. yupp. almost all der 4e3 guys and girls got dressed up. im so touched larr. lols. 1st time we got so united..=)) of cus, i got dressed up too.. i borrowed a pujabi suit from Prav. thnks gurl =)) so did se7en.. =) took lots of pictures, and here are some..


wahaha, finally i got to bully her =))


dis dumbturtle loves me.x))


darlin huatt! HUGGGGS~!


hahas. aint she pretty? =)


WE love to HUG her. xP



vonne, me, drey, howen and col. =))


GUIDES! =) except -->> lols.


look at der 2 statues. x)) lalas.


e3 girls! love them! =D


last but not least, SE7EN OH SE7EN! xD

Im SUPER HIGH dat day.. =))))

FRIDAY::
yup. ytd's lesson was borin. super borin. except for PE. =))im startin to love PE lessons more and more.. lalas. den after school drop by for guide meeting to help them out wif their commands. den went home wif huat..

after dat headed down to Dewi's hse. hahas. ytd's Dewi is not der Dewi dat i noe.. hahas. dun worry gurl, you look pretty.=) den went to meet huat and vonne den went tution lerr. hahs. after tution on der way home, me and col was like fightin away larr. lols... =x

I DUN CARE. I GONNA GO SHOPPIN ONE DAY. =x

I FOUND MY A-MATHS NOTEBOOK.=DD *hooorayy! Melvin Kong stole it.. x)) lols.

im readin dis storybook, its pretty interestin.. how can you get best frens seperated..? no idea. hahas. der book says one might kill himself.. LOL, dats crazy.

my heart skipped when i heard you askin.. x= im happy.. really.. very happy in fact.. =D thanks.. im really glad to.. but its juz dat, im afraid dat dere might not be any common topics.. if it was der past, dis wont be a problem, but now, its different..


im lost in der middle of no where.. can someone guide me?

I MISS OWYONG. x((
my amaths notebook's gone. *proof. it went away wif him.. x(( lols. i dun like der new teacher larr.. argh.

O lvls listenin compre ytd. yupp. alrite lar nt badd. but der examine's HOT. =)) hahas. but i still managed to concentrate. x))

nth interestin today, except der 3 continuous period of tests, P.O.A followed by geog. its was pretty tedious. but i tink my accts can make it, geog, hahs, forget it larr. idiotic bestie. its all your fault. bitch. i wrote crap. lols.

i suddenly dun feel like dressin up for racial harmony day any more. its like so, troublesome. x( sian sian sian. but thnks Prav and Zawiyah for bringin der costumes for me. =)) loveya!

and COLLEEN, for ur info, my mum dun love you as much as you tink so... lols. x( sorry for dat. and HE'S MINE! if dere's a need, i dun mind for a spar.lols. lets c hu wins. x))


if dis can work in real life, den our lives wont be dat miserable.. rite?

the guilt is killin me..
do you tink im happy dat way?
if you want der reali ans, it NO.
not at all.. i hate it dis way.
cant dere be balance?x(

duno y but im juz so tired these few days.. x(

ytd was our last guide meetin.. we stepped down. i feel no sense of happiness.. and i just feel dat my guidin life was full of regrets. i didnt achieve wat i always wanted to and hoped for. i never got wat i wanted, nvr in guides. even thou ive stepped down, and 1/2 yr have passed, i still dun wanna accept dat unbearable fact. my guidin life ended here wif tears and regrets.

the only thing is dat i made new frens and my dear buddies. i love them. i'll miss the sec3 guides, their laughter, wackiness, singin n blah blah blah. i trust them to bring up der guide company.thanks gurls for ur sweet lil gifts. i will miss all of u.. gurl, im not disappointed in you. i nvr up on you even till the very last minute. cuz i believe dat you can do it. its their lost for not choosin you, i certainly believe it dat way. in my heart, you are alr a PL. and i noe you have always kept der promise between us.

omg, Owyong will be leavin us for sooooo long.. i have to reali work hard w/o him.. but its a good thg dat i still haf Daniel. hahas, he praised me today! hahas. but he was late for 1 hr larr. lols. x/ and ITS REALLY TIME TO START MUGGIN.... lols.

get well soon chicky! before your MC expires. lols. x))

CAN SOMEBODY TELL ME WHY MUST YOU ALWAYS DO THIS? CANT YOU JUST TREAT IT THAT YOU DONT KNOW ME AT ALL? LET ME FEEL A LIL BETTER. CAN?

wheeeee~! =))

not mentionin der unhappy thots, im feelin kinda good these days.. no idea y.. =)) i juz wanna be happy. dats all, im not askin for too much.. am i? =x

went PY's hse today..watched high school musical there. der songs were nice.. =)) py had a hard time fixin der player.hahas.i duno why vonne, huat and me started laughin like crazy when jesse and py kept der player.. lols. i was almost out of breathe. x))

you dont have to do anythg. juz be happy. your task is to smile.. cus you are der one who brings laughter and joy to ppl. RMB, dont frown. =))

i really want us back like last time.. the guilt is killin me inside. i dun like is..(you noe hu u are..)

I HATE YOU.CAN YOU STOP ACTIN LIKE YOU CARE WHEN YOU DONT?DONT BE A HYPOCRITE. DONT MAKE ME HATE YOU MORE.. my likin for you juz turn into hatred. byebye my friend.


you left me suffering. you act like you care. BASTARD.

yoohoo~! Germany clinched der 3rd position in world cup 2oo6 last nite.






woohooo.~ vonne and me was like SOO high larr. while dat dumb turtle was snoring away.. lols. she practically nvr watch der match at all lorr. and she was damn damn noisy last night larr. wo de ma ya.. lols. and now i noe.. i dun reali care bout winning afterall. germany's victory brought my spirits high despite losin der bet.. 3 cheers for germany!!

went scouts campfire last nite. it was alrite, but our sec3 guides made it more fun and entertainin.. i love them! =)) J.t's nonsense and Jinghui's singings. hahas. FUN FUN FUN. =))

went gym wif Py and vonne today. Py's SOO late larr. lols. and im freakin tiredd. when i reached home, i slept for 4 hrs. wahahas. and der weather, shiok bodoh. x)) hahas. shall go again next week.. lalas.

i saw him online ytd. i got dat urge to take off der barrier. but i managed to hold myself backk. i noe i cant.. and im startin to hate you.. slowly.. as well as YOU. i hate betrayal, even if you tell me it was a white lie, it was all becus of me, i dun gif a fcukin damn.. dun tink you noe me very well, sorry you dont. if you noe me well enuf, you shld noe dat, the step dat you took, you are also prepared to say goodbye to me.. isnt it? you tink you could haf both at der same time, but, sometimes human jus cant be too greedy.. rite?

im PISSED today. not angry. dere's a great difference between being pissed and angry.. oh well, fcuk.

went bugis wif dewi today. hahs. we were like fightin all along larr. lols. and on when we were on der train, we watch dis 'short-live-comedy' lols. damn damn damn funny larr. dewi didnt dare to laugh out loud, but i couldnt control myself. i burst into laughter. its damn freakin entertainin larr. x))

den dewi received a call and we rushed down to harbour front and send her family off. her brother is SUPER BUBBLY CUTE larr. x)) soo chubby! like der 'xiao fei de'. xPP hahas.

why do you guys always give me dat kind of cant be bothered replies whenever i talk about him? somehow i tink dat, dis shows nth but only how well you guys understood me.. sucha disappointment. i guess even my closest one dun understand me.. dun tell me you wont feel hurt when dat happens to you.. its all nth but bullshit. i had enuf of all dat. now it seems like one 1 person understands how i feel and dats sher.. x(

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN COLLEEN~!
hope you've enjoyed your day. (if you say you didnt, im gonna slap you..)

woke up at 3am this morning to catch the match..(thanks difficult guy~!) im soo heartbroken lar. not becuz i lose der bet, its becuz my beloved germany was eliminated.. x(( i almost cried. its pointless for me to watch der upcomin matches. (except der 3rd N 4th placing..) vonne n me didnt haf der mood to go skool today.. but i dun care, germany is alr der champion in my heart. <33`

i received a call from my BELOVED bestie right after der match ended. i shld haf expected dat.. when i pick up der call, i hear nth but 'HAHAHAHAH~GERMANY LOSE.' wahh. how i wish he was rite in front of me at dat moment, so i can bash him up. x(( i hate you for dat!

IM NOT GONNA BET TODAY. =DD be a good gurl today.. i'll save der money for de other match.

i fell asleep durin a-maths today. unknowingly. lols. so dumb larr. aiyo.. im dead beat larr. x(( but somehhow i wasted time in skool today. nth went into my brain today..

celebrated col's bday after skool.. LONG LONG STORY... wahh. it freakin tire me out larr. x(( im gonna drop dead soon.. duno whether shld i wake up and watch der match today.. i hope portugal will win.. =) im puttin my hopes on them.. =)


will YOU pick up the piece and fix it back for me?

colleen zhen, im speechless. x(

=)) it has been a long time since i last hear ur voice..

hahs. bestie wanna be a cook when he grows up. hahas. so farni.. lols. he wanna compete for job wif ck. x))


listen to my heart. listen to wat it haf to say.. its all dedicated to you. and ONLY YOU.

argh. INTENSIVE TUTION today. x((

early in der mornin had A-maths tution.. im so tired larr. and i kept makin stupid careless mistakes. x( daniel tot i didnt slp last nite.. lols. when i told him i slept at 3 and why, he was like, 'serve you rite..' -.-ll heartless tutor. but i shld have listen to him..

Just before tution ends..
Daniel:: you going out arr?
Me:: yupp. science tution.
Daniel:: HAHAHA.forget it lar, you go dere oso sleep only.. x)
Me:: NO! i wont! i can concentrate der..
Daniel:: HAHAHA. wait and see..

hahas. he was rite.. i didnt learn anythg at tution today. didnt even copy a single word.x(( sian diao. waste my time... but we had some fun and laughter. lols. ah huat duno wat's a Xbox. xP hahas.

lucky i came home for dinner. mummy cooked dumplings. =)) yummy! lalalas. off for dinner! tata.


how can i ever break down dat wall..?

woohooo~! GERMANY will win!! hahahs. (i hope so..=]])

did CIP wid huat on sat. OMG. im NOT gonna do CIP wif her anymore. NEVER. arghh. try once and you'll understand. wahh. she'll make you vomit blood. x(( and ever since dat day, she gave ma dumb name, 'barbie doll'. but im nvr gonna recognise dat name. stupid ah huat.. >:(

den went out wif dewi after dat..=)) lols. her heels keep gettin stucked here and dere.. hahahs. so farni larr. stupid dewi. lols.we took pics and pics and pics.. wahahas. i love dewi! but she love me more. =))

went to my granny's hse ytd.. finally its not borin for once. played The Sims 2 wif my cousins N sis. hahas. we had a great time 'woohoo-ing'.. lols x)). only we will understand.. hahas. den my cousin oso had a hard time creatin a 'hard gay'. lols. lameshit.. xPP.

wahh. bestie scolded me STUPID for more den 1o times in a row ytd.. stupid bastard.. but i noe from der bottom of his heart, he LOVE me. hahas. its juz dat he duno how to express. x)) lols..


i wanna be dat gurl whom you hold tight in your ams..

yooohoo~=)) im early today! just reach home from PY's hse. and im going out soon.. =( im dead beat..

i took my O'lvl chinese oral ytd. thank god its not dat difficult.. i'm quite satisfied wif my performance, but i duno how did der examiners grade me.. (*prays)

den went py's hse to watch soccer wif vonne and col.. woohooo~!! GERMANY WON!! wahahas. i love PHILIPP LAHM!! he's like soooo damn cute larr. =)) (its okie if you dun agree,NAT agrees with me!lalas.) even thou we lost money, but when germany won vonne and me HUGGED each other! shalalas. we wanted to watch der 3am match, but halfway, we cant take it ler, and dats it, sweet dreams.. x) (PY took der lead. hahas.) THANKS PY! LURFE YA!

rushed home early in der mornin, and im goin out in 15 mins time for CIP. x(

i hate dis.. why isit that everytime i try to let go and when im near dere, sth will happen somehow and change my decision.. i noe i muz blame myself for being not determined.. but i juz cant.. everytime you tok to me, my heart melts.. whenever i see you, my heart will flutter... i feel so useless..


everytime i try to fly, i'll fall w/o my wings..